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Avoid these first sentences in your emails that send people to SNOOZEVILLE 😴
Andy Mewborn
February 23, 2023
Good morning to everyone except my wife, who asked me to stop singing Wonderwall. and... I said maybe... ☠️
"#1 Newsletter of the Year" 🏆️ -Andy’s Wife
😱 ANDY REACTS
Amgios and Amigas, let's talk about the latest health craze that's taking over TikTok: Ozempic, the weight loss drug. Apparently, it's all the rage with the young folks who want to shed a few pounds and look their best on camera.
Now, I'm no expert on weight loss or TikTok, but I have to say, I'm a bit skeptical of this whole Ozempic trend. I mean, sure, the drug might help you lose weight, but have you seen the side effects? Nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, oh my! That doesn't sound like a fun time to me.
But hey, if people want to risk explosive bathroom trips in the name of vanity, who am I to judge? After all, I've been known to do some crazy things in the pursuit of looking good. One time, I tried to wax my own eyebrows and ended up looking like I was permanently surprised. It wasn't a good look.
But seriously, folks, let's not get too caught up in the latest fads and trends. Instead of relying on potentially dangerous drugs, why not try good old-fashioned diet and exercise? I mean, have you ever heard of a little thing called moderation? It's not as exciting as a viral TikTok trend, but it's a lot safer and more sustainable in the long run.
So, to all my tech-savvy friends out there, remember: you don't need a drug to be healthy and happy. All you need is a little common sense, a lot of water, and maybe a pair of tweezers. Thank you, and goodnight!
☠️ ANDY’S DEADLY DOODLES
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💀 Issue #92 💀
Avoid these 5 first sentences in your emails that send people to SNOOZEVILLE 😴:
Over the past 7 years, I have analyzed 10,000+ cold emails.
99% make the same mistake...
They have first sentences that send prospects straight to SNOOZEVILLE 😴
Save your response rate and avoid these 5 first lines 👇
1. “I work for … ”
It's boring, unoriginal, and screams to the prospect, "I'm trying to sell you something!"
Instead:
Weave your company’s name in naturally.
Like this:
"X recommended we get in touch. I work with X on Google's marketing team.
2. “Did you know … ?”
You can use stats to create urgency, but dropping them in randomly won't work.
If you start with a stat, make sure to personalize it to the prospect's unique situation:
• "In the past year, I helped 10 companies increase meetings booked by 10x..."
3. “Congrats on … ”
These openings are a lazy first line.
Unless...
You get really specific.
🚫: “Congratulations on getting funded,”
✅ “Just read that you raised $5 million in Series A funding from Google -- congratulations! Your plans for expansion to the east coast..."
4. "I hope you're doing well ... "
Being vanilla kills sales.
Instead, get to the point of your message.
🚫: "I hope you're doing well..."
✅: "I worry about your company's [ability to do X, strategy for Y, response to Z]"
5. “My name is … ”
Your prospect is asleep already. BORING!
Prospects can easily determine your name...
...The "From" field or email signature tells them.
Fixing this error is dead simple.
Cut this sentence so your message starts with the next.
And that's it!
Avoid these first sentences:
• “I work for … ”
• “Did you know … ?”
• “Congrats on … ”
• "I hope you're doing well ... "
• “My name is … ”
If you enjoyed this, please 👍️ and comment on this LinkedIn post to help spread the word about DigitalSalesCollective. It only takes a few seconds. Creating each drop takes us some time. Thanks so much!
⚰️ KILLER TOOLS
What’s inside?
🍪 DEADLY DELIGHTS (free resource)
That’s a wrap for today amigos. Eat your tacos and see you tomorrow! If you want more, be sure to follow me on Twitter (@andymewborn) or LinkedIn.
What did you think of today’s edition? (anonymous)
🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ So f**cking fuego
🌶️🌶️🌶️ Meh, keep digging
🌶️ Snoozefest
A RECENT REVIEW
Andy… I look foward to this… But mostly your reactions and doodles
