Good morning to everyone except the people who pretend to be productive on Fridays ☠️

"#1 Newsletter of the Year" 🏆️ -Andy’s Wife

😱 ANDY REACTS

Apple's WWDC 2023: Where Mixed Reality Headsets Meet the Fear of iOS Updates - Surfing the Metaverse One Update at a Time

Can we talk about APPLE for a moment? No, not the healthy snack, although I'd totally take some Granny Smith premium payments. I'm talking about the TECH GIANT, APPLE.

The one that's about to make a SPLASH into the metaverse. Yeah, that’s right! Imagine Tim Cook on a virtual wave, yelling, "Cowabunga, dudes!" because, why not? In the METAVERSE, anything's possible!

They’re about to reveal their mixed-reality headset at the annual WWDC conference. Mixed reality, folks! Perfect for those of us who can't decide whether to live in the real world or escape into a digital one. It's like being stuck between a rock (your boss's Zoom call) and a hard place (your Candy Crush saga).

To all my SALES & MARKETING GENIUSES out there, think of the possibilities! You're not just selling dreams anymore, you're selling a WHOLE NEW DIMENSION. Get ready to prepare your pitches, "For just 24 easy payments of 99.99, escape your in-laws without leaving your couch! Instant teleportation included!"

But WAIT, there's more! They're also revealing iOS 17 and new Mac laptops. I mean, it’s so fast it feels like we're stuck in a TIME LOOP. But hey, if that loop includes avoiding TikTok dance challenges, I'm all in.

As for the new Mac laptops, imagine pulling out the latest model at a coffee shop, pretending to write a screenplay when you're actually working on your fantasy football team.

In all seriousness, the future is here, it’s exciting, and it's META. But, if my metaverse avatar starts nagging about iOS 18, I'm logging off!

Enjoy your day folks, and remember, if your sales are in a slump, just sell them an ALTERNATE REALITY!

☠️ ANDY’S DEADLY DOODLES

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💀 Issue #100-and-something 💀

When Kindness Met Clever: A Tale of Unexpected Triumph

I hope this newsletter finds you knee-deep in a tub of double-chocolate chip ice cream because, let's face it, that's the only proper way to read a newsletter, isn't it? 😉

So, recently, I've been thinking about this proverb I heard - "It's better to be kind than clever." An interesting notion, don't you think? It reminded me of an anecdote I'd love to share, an unexpected rendezvous between Kindness and Cleverness, and the magic that ensued.

Let's begin by introducing our protagonists. Mr. Clever, known around town for his quick wit and smarter-than-average cookie credentials. And then, we have Miss Kind, who boasts a heart so large, it could probably host its own Olympic games. Now, this is not your typical Hollywood rom-com, where they fall in love and walk into the sunset. Spoiler alert: that doesn't happen.

Instead, one sunny afternoon, they found themselves competing in the same race at the local fair. Our Mr. Clever, with his gadgetry galore, had engineered rocket boots to speed past the competition. Miss Kind, on the other hand, chose a pair of good old running shoes that had seen better days but were tried and true.

As the race kicked off, Mr. Clever zoomed ahead, leaving everyone, including Miss Kind, in a trail of dust. Halfway through, however, his high-tech boots began to sputter. Remember Wile E. Coyote and his Acme mishaps? Yeah, something like that. And just as it would happen in our favorite cartoons, he found himself stranded with no gas station in sight.

Meanwhile, Miss Kind, with her steady and consistent pace, spotted Mr. Clever stuck in a bit of a kerfuffle. She could have run past him, gaining an advantage in the race. But she stopped, spent a good ten minutes (and all her extra shoelaces) fixing Mr. Clever's boots. And then, they were off again, racing side by side towards the finish line.

As the townsfolk watched in awe, it was Miss Kind who crossed the finish line first. But in an unexpected twist, she was holding Mr. Clever's hand, ensuring they finished the race together.

This little tale from my not-so-little town left a profound impact on me. It made me realize how cleverness, while it can propel us ahead, might sometimes leave us stranded. On the other hand, kindness has a knack for bringing people together, for making us move forward, and sometimes, even win races.

So, the next time you find yourself choosing between being clever and being kind, remember our small-town race. Remember how Miss Kind not only won the race but also a friend in Mr. Clever.

Because, my dear friends, while cleverness can lead to solo victories, kindness often paves the way for collective triumphs. And isn't that the kind of world we all want to live in?

Wishing you all the kindness (and cleverness) in the world,

—Andy

P.S. Be the Miss Kind of your own story. You never know whose race you might end up winning!

P.P.S. I'll leave you with this heart-warming thought: Kindness doesn't always finish first, but when it does, it doesn't finish alone.

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That’s a wrap for today amigos. Eat your tacos and see you tomorrow! If you want more, be sure to follow me on Twitter (@andymewborn) or LinkedIn.

What did you think of today’s edition? (anonymous)

• 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ So f**cking fuego

• 🌶️🌶️🌶️ Meh, keep digging

• 🌶️ Snoozefest

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